Nothing happens to semen production because of depression per se, but lack of ejaculation over time will slow down the rate of sperm cell turnover and therefore the rate of sperm production. In general, most sperm just gets absorbed into the GU system and/or out with the urine ( there is no "sperm" build up, just pressure from congestion associated with unreleased arousal) . When regular ejaculation resumes, the sperm production very efficiently picks up the pace. Without regular ejaculation (as may occur with depression and suppressed libido), a small number of men experience nocturnal or even daytime emissions, but this is rare. And yes, of course men sometimes ejaculate from a soft penis. More importantly, why focus on this arcane aspect of the case? They obviously have little trust between them. There's hostility that might be about sexual deprivation, &/or about something else. That's what should be addressed. Where is this relationship heading? If I had to guess, I'd guess that the guy is masturbating (with or without stimulation from peep shows, lap dances, etc.) or has seen a commercial sex worker (lap dancer, prostitute, etc.), and is afraid to reveal any of it to his wife. But I wouldn't talk about this right now, because it'll get you off the central subject.
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