Way too disclosing on his part, as far as I'm concerned. I think it would be one thing for him to allow you to discuss your feelings toward him in terms of how they relate to your father. However, the allusion to "unbuttoning your buttons" , the mutual acknowledgement, in whatever terms, and the blushing are all yellow lights. Another statistic (I can go to the library and look this up if anyone insists on citations, just not tonight) is that another predictor of therapists violating boundaries in practice is if they had been sexually involved with a therapist as a client themselves (and I consider sexual overtones in conversation as sexual involvement). I'm not saying you would go there, but I do suggest you take a strong hard look at boundary issues. As posted earlier, a few posters made it pretty evident that even the very innocent can get hung out to dry, and you don't ever want to create the illusion of that sort. If you think that there was anything okay about the sexual allusions in therapy, there weren't. There are other and better ways of dealing with father figure issues. Sex can be emotionally powerful. You seem like a balanced strong person. But what about the more fragile client that gets taken up in such fantasies, and then, like you said, the therapist cools off and distances himself?
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