Thanks for clarifying.
While I do agree that clients should not be forced to disclose anything, when a client says "I don't want to talk about it" (whatever the thing is, sex or otherwise) I say "you don't have to talk about it, but we do need to talk about why you don't want to talk about it." And indeed, the reason is often more important than the content.
As you note, it is an extremely delicate business to both respect clients' boundaries and to be fiercely pushing, pulling, prodding, demanding, inviting, and gently accepting--all at the same time.
Being "polite" has no place in therapy. Being sensitive, aware, and thoughtful, of course, is crucial. Being invested in clients liking you or thinking you're a good therapist is a huge pitfall, and virtually cripples a therapist.
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