I understand your point and agree with you generally. However, I am more concerned about protecting the person who in this case appears (to me) to be a victim than in diagnosing or in making value judgments. It is true, I do not know the motivations of the persons involved; I do not know the history, I do not know the circumstances. I do know that someone was concerned enough to ask for help on this message board, which leads me to believe there is something there. Perhaps I was too hasty in labeling the husband/boyfriend (I can't recall and I don't really want to go back and read the post again), but I think there is a valid argument that when one pretends to rape another, without that person's knowledge of the "game" or consent to it (and without revealing one's identity), there is cause for concern. Remember, we have been telling the world for years that rape is an act of violence and not of sex. Have we discarded this notion?
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