It seems to me as long as there are equivalent services elsewhere, he should be referred out. For his benefit, as well as yours. I wouldn't worry about him saying bad things about you...your co-workers know better than that, don't they? Him knowing where you live is, I think, a legitimate concern. His behavior at your home, and your personal involvement in this "bad drama" justifies caution and concern. Sadly, this is not an uncommon dynamic with low functioning, substance-abusing (and/or co-dependent)couples.
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