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Unread April 16th, 2007, 08:50 AM
stillsearching stillsearching is offline
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 11
Default EMDR Trauma

Thank you Sandra for answering my last post "afraid to try EMDR again". I don't have specific questions but I hope that therapists who read my post will take the warning to be very cautious with clients with dissociative disorders, ( I have DD NOS) I thought alot about what you had said about making sure all the go states are on-board. The more I thought about my experience with EMDR, the more I dissociated and the more distressed I became. I realized that although my "adult" agreed and thought we could make it through it, some of my inner children were not in agreement at all. The EMDR actually tramatized these children again. Yes, they were forced to comply in silence. I didn't realize what was happening at the time and now feel some resentment for my therapist for not knowing better.,

Going though with the EMDR without my children in agreement brought back all the feelings of being victimized and violated.. I did wonder why I felt that way when I was the one who agreed to try EMRD but it all makes sense now. It has probably been close to a year since I last did EMDR and I have not gotten over it yet.. It now is just one more thing added to the pile of stuff my ego-states live with. Maybe it feels so bad because they trusted my therapist and blame him for hurting them when he has convinced them they would be safe?? My children had been through that more than once.. It was like repeating history for them. It doesn't matter what the nautre of the violation was. It is all the sme to them.

Thank you for helping me to understand what happened.. I have felt like a failure for not being able to handle EMDR.
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Unread April 16th, 2007, 01:58 PM
Sandra Paulsen Sandra Paulsen is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Bainbridge Island WA
Posts: 207
Default Re: EMDR Trauma

I am grateful that you have put forward your story the way you did. It will help therapists and clients alike to see what the risks are of skipping the step of determining how on board a client's self system is.

Many highly dissociative clients don't know they even HAVE parts. Its up to the therapist to take the necessary steps to reveal whether there is a dissociative disorder that must organize the approach to the preparation for EMDR.

Even DDNOS clients can find EMDR retraumatizing.

I hope clients who see themselves in this picture will also take the opportunity to have a different outcome than they could the "first time through" with trauma. Name, this time to speak up, assert themselves, and feel entitled to set their boundaries and limits. A therapist worth her or his salt will respect and applaud that step. That way even a therapeutic mistep, impasse, or rupture can itself become the vehicle for a step toward healing.
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